NEED CRITICS for my NOVEL
Posted: June 15th, 2010, 8:48 am
I'm now currently encoding my masterpiece and sooner or later, I will be able to post an episode. By that time, I will be expecting for the comments of the people who are interested. For the mean time, let me post some fillers in this thread.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
My name is Rheinlander, 16 years of age. I use the name "Laurell Weinder" in this forum. I'm from the Philippines and I'm currently taking up Bachelor of Arts in Communication.
I started writing stories when I'm still in elementary. I've been inspired by DC during that time so I wrote mystery stories before. Until now, I'm still writing stories, particularly the detective/mystery genre.
For the following days to come, I'll be busy studying my lessons while I'm putting my effort in the novel that you are about to read.
Synopsis
Year 2019, the year when time traveling is proven, Philippines is finally a developed country with no debts in other nations, thanks to the support from an organization known as the "Paradigmatic Ordinal." Everything was peaceful and prosperous at that time. Until one day, something terrible happened. The head of the Ordinal, known as the First, was found dead and the power was given to the man known as the Seventh. That marked the end of the peaceful days. The Seventh grabbed the power from the government and proclaimed himself as the new president of the Republic. The country fell into chaos. Everything is hopeless until the superiors of the Ordinal, who opposes the way of the Seventh, sent an agent to the past in order to change the future.
The agent named Erald successfully arrived to the past where he met two students who will later help him on his quest. As soon as he told them about the gruesome future that awaits them, he decided to enroll at Joseph C. Felicia University, one of the elite universities in the country, where the Ordinal was founded. Unfortunately, he found no clues about the Ordinal until he stumbled upon a case that might lead him to what he is looking for. Days after, he decided to form a Detective Club to solve cases happening around the campus and to track down the Ordinal, which has been behind the curtains in some incidents. He also met other students with deductive capabilities and together, they solve cases.
The time finally came when a man who called himself as the First, but the group's name is not that of the Ordinal, sent a challenge notice to the Detective Club. The First aims to test the deductive capabilities of Erald and the others through playing a real-life Mafia game. Little does the Detective Club know that the First's pieces have been already set even before the notice was given.
In the future, the Seventh has learned the escape of Erald and has dispatched his elite squad known as the Seven Cardinals to annihilate Erald, thus preventing any changes from the past to occur in the future. Erald's and the others' lives were put in danger through assassination attempts. Once the real threat arrives, will Erald still be able to do what he's supposed to?
That is the synopsis of the story, I guess. I know that there are still plausible points here. So feel free to ask.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
My name is Rheinlander, 16 years of age. I use the name "Laurell Weinder" in this forum. I'm from the Philippines and I'm currently taking up Bachelor of Arts in Communication.
I started writing stories when I'm still in elementary. I've been inspired by DC during that time so I wrote mystery stories before. Until now, I'm still writing stories, particularly the detective/mystery genre.
For the following days to come, I'll be busy studying my lessons while I'm putting my effort in the novel that you are about to read.
Synopsis
Year 2019, the year when time traveling is proven, Philippines is finally a developed country with no debts in other nations, thanks to the support from an organization known as the "Paradigmatic Ordinal." Everything was peaceful and prosperous at that time. Until one day, something terrible happened. The head of the Ordinal, known as the First, was found dead and the power was given to the man known as the Seventh. That marked the end of the peaceful days. The Seventh grabbed the power from the government and proclaimed himself as the new president of the Republic. The country fell into chaos. Everything is hopeless until the superiors of the Ordinal, who opposes the way of the Seventh, sent an agent to the past in order to change the future.
The agent named Erald successfully arrived to the past where he met two students who will later help him on his quest. As soon as he told them about the gruesome future that awaits them, he decided to enroll at Joseph C. Felicia University, one of the elite universities in the country, where the Ordinal was founded. Unfortunately, he found no clues about the Ordinal until he stumbled upon a case that might lead him to what he is looking for. Days after, he decided to form a Detective Club to solve cases happening around the campus and to track down the Ordinal, which has been behind the curtains in some incidents. He also met other students with deductive capabilities and together, they solve cases.
The time finally came when a man who called himself as the First, but the group's name is not that of the Ordinal, sent a challenge notice to the Detective Club. The First aims to test the deductive capabilities of Erald and the others through playing a real-life Mafia game. Little does the Detective Club know that the First's pieces have been already set even before the notice was given.
In the future, the Seventh has learned the escape of Erald and has dispatched his elite squad known as the Seven Cardinals to annihilate Erald, thus preventing any changes from the past to occur in the future. Erald's and the others' lives were put in danger through assassination attempts. Once the real threat arrives, will Erald still be able to do what he's supposed to?
That is the synopsis of the story, I guess. I know that there are still plausible points here. So feel free to ask.
